Tuesday, April 28, 2020

Happy Birthday


About 4 years old

April 29 is a special day for me each year, this year especially so.  April 29, 1920 was the day Theodore Gibson Hallsted was born.  In my book, he was an incredibly special man….my Pop.  Every year for the past 13 years I have paused on this date, remembering him with so much love and adoration, this year for his birthday even more so.

I could of course share a boat load of memories, but what I enjoy the most are the stories that enveloped him over the years….because in so many ways he was remarkable.  Here are a couple of my favorites.

Pop was an avid outdoorsman, a hunter and fisherman.  One favorite story was told by an uncle….they were out rabbit hunting one winter day.  Rabbit, back in the day, was a staple on our dinner table.  From a good ways across an open corn field Pop spied a dark spot along a fence row.  He pointed it out to my uncle and remarked that a rabbit was hiding in the hole.  My uncle could only see the dark spot.  Slowly Dad walked toward it, crouched down, reached in a pulled a rabbit out by the ears.  For whatever reason that bunny was spared its life that day, but my uncle remembered the story his entire life.   

High School Graduation
My Mom comes from a family of 14….8 girls, 6 boys (12 survived to adulthood).  The youngest son was a young teenager when Mom and Dad married.  Both Mom and Dad grew up on farms and were of course very familiar with farm life.  One of Dad’s favorite stories involved Mom’s youngest brother.  

Whatever they were doing that day out at the Poff family farm, I’m pretty sure the original plan didn’t include this adventure.  Everyone knew the barn was filled with rats and that anytime a human entered the barn the rats scattered out the drain pipes into the surrounding fields.  Whatever possessed Pop to pull this one we will never know, but…..he convinced his young brother-in-law to grab a seed sack and hold it over the open end of the drain pipe as Pop entered the barn.  Within seconds the bag was filled with screaming rats and brother-in-law had more than he could handle.  He was running across the field with the bag full of rats flying above his head.  He eventually flung it out into the field with the bag and rats flying in every direction.  I don’t think he ever forgave Dad that one.

Another outcome of living your entire life on a farm is becoming a ‘jack-of-all-trades’.  Dad could fix anything….you name it, he could fix it.  As a result, during WWII as the male population of Warren County, Ohio depleted due to the draft, there were fewer and fewer men who could fix farm equipment.  This was a big deal as farmers depended on men like Dad.  Dad had a reputation in the county as being very good at farm machinery repair and fair in price. So, as time passed and his number came up in the draft farmers organized in the county and went to the Daft Board to plead their case for Pop not to be drafted….it worked, multiple times. 
Marine Corp

Eventually, of course, the Army did get him.  But on his way to Basic Training a Marine Recruiter came through the train looking for 3 volunteers to switch to the Marines.  No one stepped forward.  A short time later he came through again and called out 3 names, Hallsted being one of them.  Might have been a good thing; Pop never left Parris Island when the Marines found out how good he was at fixing machinery.  They were also short good repair men for the same reason.  It helped that Pop was finally drafted near the end of the war.  
Dad fishing in Alaska

So….April 29 brings back all my memories and so many stories of this remarkable man.  I think of him so often and am so grateful that he was MY Dad.  

Happy 100th Birthday Pop!!

Monday, April 06, 2020

Eulogy for the Dearest Friend


September 1961 was starting off as usual…back to school, 8th grade at Pinellas Park Jr. High School.  All the old friends were back in the same home room….Dwight Smith, Louise Hall, Mike Fancher, John Foley and so on.  On the third day of the new school year the school secretary walked in with an obviously new student trailing behind.  She was introduced as Nancy Trick and the secretary said Nancy needed to share a locker with someone, who would volunteer?  My hand shot up first.

That same year Walt Disney Studios had released a film called “The Parent Trap” and the star was a young actress named Haley Mills.  I was obsessed with Haley Mills.  She was so delightful on screen and I envied her beauty and sparkling personality.  I wanted to be just like her.

Nancy Trick, my new locker mate, could have been a twin sister to Haley Mills.    So I have to admit that was my motivation for volunteering so quickly.  Little did I know at the time it was a spontaneous act that started a friendship which was to last close to 60 years.          

Nancy and I were to become inseparable.   By the end of 8th grade I knew her well.   She did not have the sparkling personality of Haley Mills…she was in fact an introvert and had a hard time warming up to people.  She was guarded; as I was to learn later, with good reason.  But the beauty was, when she knew you, when she trusted you, she was your friend forever.

Our adventures through Jr. Hi and High School were phenomenal.  Two good girls who were into all kinds of mischief and never got caught; it was hilarious.  Won’t name names but….there was the time we hid in my bedroom closet until after Nancy’s date gave up.  We were a dynamite basketball duo.  I would get the ball to Nancy and she would make the shot, every time.  To the point where our Phys Ed teacher split us up and wouldn’t let us be on the same team.  There was the time she left her date at the drive-in and joined me and my date in our car.  Never returned to her date’s car.  It went on and on.  

Nancy, Sue, Jane, Ray
Things did change when we hit high school.  We were no longer in the same home room and our circle of friends expanded in different directions, but, our friendship remained steadfast.  She met her future husband and I made the decision that marriage was not in the foreseeable future for me.  She married Ken and off they went to the Navy.  I hung around for 2 years after high school and then moved back to my home state of Ohio and for the next 52 years we were pretty much never together but also never apart.  We stayed in touch.

She and Ken returned to Florida when the Navy thing was over with their young son.  I never returned except for visits which always included her.  She went on to have 2 more children and I didn’t marry until I was 42.  But through all those years there was always a strong bond that kept us in touch.  I suspect the longest time we didn’t communicate was 10 months, the 10 months I lived on Guam.  There was always the phone and we could visit for very a long time.
During Better Times

But life took a dramatic turn for Nancy.  At some point she was given an antibiotic that she turned out to be allergic to.  From that day on she was a severe asthmatic.  Then during a hospital stay for her asthma she suffered a heart attack, which wasn’t treated for several hours….causing her heart to be severally damaged.  After that, between the asthma and the damaged heart and aging, her health went steadily downhill.  

Until, Saturday morning, April 4, 2020, her youngest son Jonathan called to let me know that early Saturday morning Nancy died of a heart attack.  She was a night owl who liked to watch late night TV.  Around 1 AM Ken checked on her and found her gone.  

When Jonathan called I was shocked and not shocked.  I knew the call was coming eventually.  But, I cannot imagine a world without Nancy in it.  Her smile.  Her laughter.  Our fabulous visits.  I now suffer from a huge hole in my soul.  

Until next time Nancy.